Friday, September 25, 2009

Pavlov's Got My Number

I don't like listening to phone messages on the Thursday before chemo days. That is when I get a recorded message from my oncologist's office reminding me that I have chemo on Monday.

Like I can forget.

Before I went to bed Wednesday night I knew it was coming the next day.

All day long yesterday I couldn't help but wait for it. Wait for it. Not in the looking forward to way. More somewhere between pressing on and panic.

It makes me crazy how even though I know it's not "bad" chemo anymore and therefore is not going to make me super sick, my body still doesn't trust me on that, so it just goes ahead and starts to gear up for the worst. Slight headache...check. Wee bit of nausea...check. Pit in stomach for no reason...check. Cloud over the weekend...check.

Well, thank God it's Friday anyway. And my sis-tah and nephew come visit tomorrow! So take that, pit in my stomach and Pavlov.


debbiep said...

Next time, lets go hang out and do something fun on wednesday! Do you panic on wednesday or from wednesday to monday? BEcause if it's from wednesday to monday, then that calls for a road trip.

Daria said...

Julie, I have chemo on Tuesday and as of yesterday ... I`ve been a bit more agitated, short-tempered and just beside my self.

Wishing you all the best with your treatment.